Life Coaching

How to make better decisions

Louis Pasteur once said “Chance favors only the prepared mind.” I am always ready to talk about my book. Watch this short video, subscribe to the channel, and get your own copy via links provided in YouTube description.

Your life is your job. How was your last review?

If living a fulfilling life is, indeed, the ultimate job, then we have a number of interesting challenges. First, we all got “hired” regardless of our qualifications, educational backgrounds, skills, and references. Second, the “job description” does not come with the job. Finally, “job reviews” are often tied to “job descriptions” that are false.

Many high-functioning and high-achieving individuals do not share similar cultural and educational backgrounds. We have “book-smart” and “street-smart” success stories rivaling with “being-in-the-right-place-at-the-right-time” sensations. With the development of road infrastructure, the employment is no longer tied to a geographical proximity to an employer. The proliferation of personal computers and the internet has further changed our lives. Today, taking a class, going shopping, doing banking, investing, and even dating could all be accomplished from the comfort of one’s home or apartment. There are more life choices one can take today, compared to 20 years ago. Therefore, there are more “jobs” of living a fulfilling live to choose from.

How did you choose your path when you entered independent life? Do you remember what and who influenced your decisions about your first job, car, apartment, life partner? Where you happy with these decisions and why? Are you still regretting some of the decisions made 20-30 years ago? All of these decisions were part of “on-the-job-training” of the choice-making skill. We get better at making choices as we get better at understanding ourselves and where we would ultimately want to end up in life. Some know that destination point early on, while others keep looking for it for most of their lives.

Career in Life could be viewed in many terms, while each passing year is yet another year of Life experience. What does “promotion” in the job of Life means to you? Is that the attainment of wisdom, new friends, and family members? These are all challenging questions that each of us may answer slightly different. The good news is that there is no right or wrong answers.

Is it possible that when we ask “what is the meaning of my life?” we are asking for life’s “job description?” After all, wouldn’t it be great to have a clear set of objectives that are specifically written for each and everyone of us? While in my thirties, I have started to look for my life’s “job description” on my own but to no avail. Then, I have asked for it many times. Sometimes, I would ask politely, others – not so much. Finally, I got my answer! The proverbial treasure chest came to existence. As I opened it with excitement, it revealed only a blank piece of scroll with my name on it. A little note I found below the scroll had only one sentence “Do it yourself.” Thanks! Intuitively, I knew some of the items I needed write on that scroll. These were things I strongly believed in. These beliefs came out of my own life experiences that I was either running away from, or the experiences I was running towards. With time, I understood that the things I was running towards represented my values. Thus, I wrote my “job description” for a job of a Runner. Today, looking more like a bald Mario without a mustache, I run in pursuit of “gold coins”, or experiences that are in strong alignment with my values.

The minute we are born, we come with a set of “instructions.” The two primary goals of our existence as infants are to add inches and pounds to our bodies. Periodically, we get our “job review” that is nothing more than taking a few measurements. As a parent, I recall the instances when the pediatrician would say “good job” while reviewing my children’s measurements. “Good job” meant that the measurement made top 25 percentile.  With time, the “instructions” and “job reviews” got more elaborate as they came from the doctors, teachers, friends and family. Soon, we got used to comparing much of our individual traits to some outside “norm”, or “job description.”

It is hard to have a meaningful “job review” without a “job description” that comes from within. “Keeping up with Joneses”, while a fairly common “objective”, comes from the outside and gets into “job description” that is often a source of disappointment during a “job review”. It has been my observation that the more advance we get in age, the less enthused we are about celebrating our birthdays. Why? I have my own and non-scientific theory that birthdays, class and family reunions, and New Years are the moments when we tend to subject ourselves to comparisons to our friends and family. These comparisons, or “job reviews,” are not based on self-written “job descriptions” and tend to be negative. Figuring out your own values and aligning them with your own goals is, in fact, writing your life’s “job description.” Getting clarity on how will you measure your progress during your “job reviews” is essential for living a happy and fulfilling life.